The New Babysitter? The Next Babysitter.
I was working a full-time nanny job at the time and I had gone online to look for some extra babysitting opportunities. I found a family with two young children, 4 and 5, that needed a babysitter for the night while the parents went out to a concert. They lived fairly close to where I was living. so I sent them a nice message, told them a little bit about myself and my experience and I got a reply within minutes. “Great,” it said, “Can you be here at 7?”. They didn’t call or anything, which I found a little odd. They also never asked for any references. I had been working as a nanny for quite a while at that point and I could have provided excellent references if asked, but they didn’t seem to need (or want) it. This did bother me. I knew myself and I knew that I was a great babysitter, which meant the family had nothing to fear, but what if I hadn’t been? Who hands their children off to a person they know absolutely nothing about?
After being given the address I hopped on a bus and headed over to their house. The door was opened by the dad; a very nice man in his early 40s who smiled widely and thanked me for coming. The kids were running around inside and once I walked through the door they both came up to greet me. They were surprisingly polite for children their ages. We sat down at their arts-and-crafts table to make pretty pictures while the dad ran upstairs to get ready. I managed to make the children laugh within minutes and I felt pretty good about myself. They liked me. The dad later came back down accompanied by the mother.“Wow,” he said with a smile, “I see you’ve become friends already!” He seemed genuinly pleased as the mom came over to say hello. She was a bit colder in her way of treating me, but still nice and polite. They left the house shortly after that.
The kids and I had a great evening together. We drew pictures, played with their toys, played hide and seek and read books. As I was turning off the lights for them to go to sleep, the youngest child looked at me with big brown eyes. “I like you a lot,” she said,“please stay.” It made me happy, so I gave her a big hug and a kiss on the forehead.“Don’t worry,” I said and smiled reassuringly, “I’ll come back soon.” The girl kept looking at me and then she shook her head. “No you won’t.” Her lower lip trembled a little as she said it. I asked her what she meant and she told me that they had different babysitters every time. “They never come twice,” she said.
That really stuck with me. There she was; this lovely little 4-year-old girl with braids in her hair, so aware of the fact that she would never see me again. I have always loved being a nanny and a babysitter, but those words made me see the potential downside to my profession. I was not going to be that fun edition to this family, but instead just another face that the children would never see again. I don’t know why their parents chose to hire different babysitters every time, or why they didn’t bother to check references or anything. They seemed like decent people. I personally think that having a nanny or a babysitter is something great – both for the parents and for the children in the family. However, children need stability and I am not sure what I think about having so many different people coming and going all the time.
When I work with kids I always try to make sure that they understand that I will always be there for them, even when I no longer work for their parents. I want them to know that I am not just there because someone pays me to be, but because I want to be and because I am someone they can count on. I am just wondering what kind of a message it sends to kids when babysitters come and go, and where they know that they will never come back. What that girl said to me went straight to my heart and I doubt I will ever forget it. There was so much sadness in her voice.
The parents arrived home later that night, and they both seemed genuinly happy with my work efforts. They thanked me several times before I left, told me how incredible it was that I had gotten both kids to go to sleep, and asked if I was available later that week. I was, but I never heard from them after that. The little girl was right, after all. She never saw me again.